Why would a girl not want you to know she has a crush on you?

I was convinced that the guy was “out of my league.” Usually, I tried to be fairly careful about who I had a crush on, trying to stick with the cute, smart, sweet and shy guys who could make me laugh, but every now and then I would find myself liking guys who were popular or otherwise unavailable (like one of the football players). This wasn't what I wanted, but sometimes feelings can't be helped. I wouldn't show it, and stayed stonefaced until the crush would finally pass. I knew that if the popular girls ever found out about it, they would make my life a living hell. It wasn't worth getting bullied by jealous popular girls at school (or later, at work).

Shyness. Eventually my childhood shyness faded, although my introversion remained. As far as crushes, the shyness was still full force. I literally couldn't tell them how I felt. If I didn't like them like that, I was fine, and treated them like I would any other friend. If I did, forget it. I never thought anyone would like me or be attracted to me enough to want to date me, so why hope for something different. (These feelings still creep up even now.)

I was raised as an ultra-conservative Christian. In those conservative circles, girls were instructed not to make the first move if she liked a boy, or even make it known. Ever. No exceptions, even if you went to the same church (multidenominational relationships were frowned upon, if not outright forbidden, even in different Christian denominations). It just wasn't done, even in the 90s. Girls who did were denounced as skanks, if not outright sl*ts. “Good girls” waited patiently to be asked, and if they weren't asked, it wasn't meant to be. I remember being told as a teenager by my mother that I would get the punishment of my life if she ever found out that I called a boy first, or asked a boy out on a date, instead of him calling or asking me out first. This is not as common nowadays, but some parents are still like that.

Does any other guys get turned on by dick pic makes you lick lips because you what to suck?

Even the guys who could have been interested in me, if I knew that a friend of mine was interested in him, or he was into my friend first, I wouldn't make my feelings known. I would also decline those scattered date requests, if I knew that my friend had liked him first or if he liked my friend first. Girls can be weird about that kind of thing, and the last thing I wanted was drama. Some female friends of mine got jealous of the guy liking me, even if they weren't interested themselves. Immature, but it was like that sometimes. They were good friends otherwise, but throw a guy into the mix and they could get very catty. A few of my male friends acted very odd or even jealous when someone else would ask me out, but obviously their reasoning was a little different, unbeknownst to me. It literally didn't occur to me until many years later that they may have possibly liked me themselves. I do not do well with “signals” and assumed they were lying or had the deliberate intention of mocking me even if they were able to ask me out.

In my case, only a few guys have figured out that I had a crush on them, and that was usually because they figured it out. I felt like I had to deny it to preserve my reputation as a “good Christian girl.” It wasn't because I told them about how I felt (there were only two exceptions as an adult; one didn't like me back and the other one did). As far as why, there were usually a few core reasons.

The other women in my family felt that there was something wrong with me. They could not understand why I wasn't interested in makeup, doing my hair in something other than a ponytail, trying to make good grades (instead of just underperforming and pretending that the boys were smarter) or dressing in more feminine-like clothing. My mother especially. She told me that no boy would ever like me if I didn't make more of an effort to look attractive, and if he did, he was lying so he could get sex from the plain girl (meaning me). Nowadays I know that it's not necessarily true, and different guys have different preferences, but at the time it really hurt. I decided that it was better to simply be platonic friends with guys, rather than hoping for more.

Hi everybody! I have been looking at posts on narcs and narc abuse on here and if has really helped me out a lot. I am currently struggling with my situation and need some advice/support. I met a narc last year, everything seemed to good to be true. Love bombing, always texting calling and taking me on dates. Everything changed when someone warned me about him out in public in front of him and who he is. This caused a conflict with us and the love bombing seized. he would tell me that everything is okay and i can come and talk. He would set a time limit on me and kick me out after that. he would then text me like everything was fine and we hung out again and after that he completely ghosted me for one week. He came back and texted me a week later laughing about the ghosting and acting like nothing had happened. he continued to text me ( not like in the beginning) make plans with me, then on the day of the plans he would just ghost me. One day he would act interested the next silence. i contacted him a month later and he acted like nothing happened. He was on a vacation and sent me a picture of another woman ( someone he allegedly met on the trip) to strike a reaction but i never gave him one. After the trip he came to my place and was extremely rude, accusing me of going on dates with a bunch of men. The next day he accused me of being an alcoholic and that he wanted nothing to do with me but said well maybe we can be "friends" then ghosted me i assumed at this point it was over and i would never hear from him again. He contacted me on the holiday a month later acting like everything was great. We ended up hanging out a month or so later and when we hung out it went well, i thought things were going in the right direction. after we hung out.. silence. I would try to text him and if he replied it would be very short then he just stopped replying. He ghosted me for almost three months. I thought he was done this time and of course he popped up again like nothing happened. At this point i was getting sick of if so i questioned him as to why he dissapeared and always does this. Of course he had some sob story about a injury and family member dying of cancer. I felt pity for him and he gave me an apology.. so i took him back stupidly. things seemed to be going smooth for a couple months, of course until his family member died and his injury got better he never contacted me and was distant. Menawhile, i was there for him during the difficult time for him. He lied to me about the funeral and never wanted to chat. I was chasing him and he would always claim nothing was wrong but when i said i thought he used me when he was down he could not handle it and would always tell me he didnt care and to go away. I would get so upset i would try texting him to work it out he would barelt respond and if he did he would not be nice about it. we did hang out a couple times after that, he would ignore me after. One day i was like hey i think you are seeing someone else, and i was like well ixam seeing someone so no problem if you are he said " buy bye good luck with your new guy stop contacting me" i was devastated and tried to get into contact with him for weeks then i just gave up and accepted it was over. He ended up contacting me a month later acting like everything was fine. He wanted to go out and have drinks i told him i would. He and i both seemed to have a great time. He ends up ignoring me again. I kept texting him trying to figure out what was wrong. He kept saying everything was fine and i said ok can we hang out again? He said maybe i was like why? He just kept saying maybe … our last conversation we had… i said what is wrong ? He said nothing is wrong everything is fine. I asked him why he keeps saying maybe. He said " maybe but i dont want to see you right now" i said why? He saix " im just not feeling it, if i wanted to date i would" i said why did you contact me less then a week ago wanting to go out? He said i didnt.. even though he did. So i said should i just move on or what? He said whatever you want to do. So i said that he was really confusing me and asked him if he had anything more to say before i move on? My messages were turning green so i panicked he blocked me and reacted irrationally. I said " omg did you block me? My messages are not going through. Even texted him on my work phone asking what was up. And called him twice ( please dont judge me i know it is pathetic i never was this type of girl before him) so he replied and said " Ok I'll block you now" then immedietly blocked me. He has never blocked me before since I have met him he will just ghost. Is this ths final discard aka " grand finale? Did i just push him too far? this has upset me so much its hard to even function.

Any of these things (or others) could be going on with girls who don't want to admit what they feel.

I was brutally humiliated in the eighth grade. I had this crush on a very smart (cough NERDY coughcough) Asian guy in some of my classes, and I guess I was a little too obvious about it (not that he liked me back, lol!) and the other kids figured it out. They tortured me about it, calling me an ugly sl*t, and the usual bullying I received was jacked up times 10, until they found someone else to mock in a few weeks. Neither of us was popular in the slightest, and if there was any chance of his returning my feelings, it was eliminated by the other kids viciously taunting us. (There were no anti-bullying rules back then, and my middle school teachers and principal preferred not to get involved with things like that.) I know that I'm an adult now, but having something like that happen when you're just barely in your teens does something to you, and nothing good. I'm just thankful that this happened years before social media was a thing. I'm also very thankful that nobody from my church attended my middle school, to help spread the entirely false rumors about my supposed “sl*tty behavior,” just because the wrong person noticed that I had a crush on someone. After that incident, I was very careful about letting people notice any of my potential crushes on anyone. I was afraid to do so, considering it sl*tty to show my feelings to anyone. Some men my age still think like this even though junior high/middle school (grades 6–9, or ages 11-15 or so) is now several decades behind us.